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Akiva Lane
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What did the doctor's wife say when his new practice was slow?

You just need more practice in your new practice, and you need patience for more patients.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a good name for a company that sells sprinkler systems?

Cease Fire (an actual name of a company)

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Akiva Lane
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Does the Moot Pencil Company make very sharp pencils?

That's a moot point.

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Akiva Lane
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What was Bill's reaction when someone approached him with a negative attitude?

He was non-plussed.

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Akiva Lane
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What was Judy's reaction when the milk spilled on the floor?

No use crying over spilled milk.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the therapist tell Francine?

Her problems were all in her head.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did men find it difficult to understand what Abigail Terious was all out?

She was Miss-terious.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the trend called where people take pieces of coal with them on dates?

Carbon dating.

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Akiva Lane
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Because Gus Jones was so much fun to be with, what was his nickname?

Fun Gus.

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What did Mr. & Mrs. Auer call eating a meal together?

They called it our Auer hour.

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Akiva Lane
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Do people gain weight as they get older?

If they do, it's a waist of time.

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Akiva Lane
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What part of a car is similar to these wooden dashes?

The dashboard.

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