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Akiva Lane
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What did the football player say when he punted the ball by mistake?

No punt intended.

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Akiva Lane
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What was a misunderstanding between Bill and his wife?

She asked for toilet water for her birthday, and he didn't know it meant perfume.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a plant growing out of an egg called?

An egg plant.

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What Far Eastern city's music has something in common with the blues?

Seoul music.

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What French Queen did not advocate dieting?

Marie Antoinette said 'Let them eat cake.'

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What kind of car can become a religious convert?

A convertible.

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What kind of eyes are good for saving money?

Econom eyes.

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Why was Bill so exhausted after a day of putting tires on the inner rings of car wheels?

It was tire ring.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Bill's therapist say about his putting plus signs in front of all numbers?

He said it was a good sign and a positive development.

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What do you call a pair of pants that wants to be forever young?

Peter pants.

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What is the lesson of daylight savings time?

If clocks can change, so can we.

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Why did the push-button go to the therapist?

Each time someone pushed it, it was depressed.

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