Pictures:

What do you call and aunt that doesn't like people?

Aunt Tipathy

1913

How do we know that the ancient Egyptians were not honest?

They were into pyramid schemes.

3139

Why is it difficult to be brave in the North Pole?

There's a tendency to get cold feet.

3227

In music how much is a quarter note worth?

25 cents.

1714

What do you call a polygon with thousands of sides?

A balagon ('overly complicated' in Hebrew)

2267

What does a car say when you fill it up with gas?

Tanks.

356

Why did Martha not appreciate her beautiful kitchen counters?

She took it for granite.

226

How would you describe the fact that ducks make more and better eggs than chickens?

It's a para-ducks.

355

What spice doesn't need an expiration date?

Thyme.

1117

What nationality is known for always completing tasks?

The Finnish.

2897

What is someone called who can't stop weaving on a loom?

A loomatic.

2739

Why did Nicholas's friends call him 'Nick'?

Because that was his nickname.

2969