Pictures:

Akiva Lane
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Why did Joe find it hard to get a date?

Because his attitudes were dated.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Ed swim to the very bottom of his swimming pool?

He had a problem with the pool, and he wanted to get to the bottom of it.

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Akiva Lane
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What is an example of an American war that was not civil?

The Civil War.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Alice call the hair she cut off because it was full of knots?

Forget me knots.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the union leader start ironing his shirt?

Because he didn't want to strike until the iron was hot.

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Akiva Lane
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When Bill had to choose between a heavy oar and a light oar to use with his kayak, what did he choose?

Either oar.

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Akiva Lane
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What's the motto of a computer programmer who enjoys programming?

I never metadata I didn't like.

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Akiva Lane
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What is someone called who puts up gates in alleys?

Alley gater.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a tile that can do many things?

Versa tile.

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Akiva Lane
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What's the advantage of buying eye glasses with frames colored by Rose Jones?

You can see through Rose-colored glasses.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Bob say to the fly that what bothering him?

Don't bug me.

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Akiva Lane
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Does therapy often cost a lot?

Yes, but you can keep the change.

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