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Why did Avigail get mad when her 10 year old daughter put on lipstick?

Because it made her see red.

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What is it called when an electrician charges a lot to install a lighting system?

The charge of the light brigade.

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What do longshoremen and medical secretaries have in common?

The both work at the docs.

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What do you call someone who is always drinking coffee?

A caf-fiend.

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How did Billy feel when he blew out the candles on his birthday cake?

He was delighted.

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How did Bertha feel about the numbers 3, 5, 7, and 9?

She thought they were odd.

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What is a bee called right after it is born?

A newbie.

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How are vegetables different than kids?

Vegetables are bad when spoiled and good when fresh, but it's not good if kids are either fresh or spoiled.

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What did the Mayor say when the workers put street signs upside down?

This is not a good sign.

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In music how much is a quarter note worth?

25 cents.

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On what floor of a building do workers grind wheat into flour?

The ground floor.

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What does Shakespeare getting sick have to do with feeling angry at someone?

ILL WILL.

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