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Akiva Lane
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Why did Matt run in the desert?

For the big race, he wanted to make a dry run.

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Akiva Lane
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If you can get 100 somethings for a penny today, how sure can you be that this will be the price tomorrow?

One hundred per cent.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Amanda feel about the fact that science doesn't understand why people are ticklish?

She thought it was mys-tickle.

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Akiva Lane
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What animal is similar to a tree that looks like a pole?

Poultry.

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Akiva Lane
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Did Sodom and Gomorrah deserve their punishment?

Moral less.

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Akiva Lane
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When the pioneers cut down trees to clear the land, how did they feel about the difficult process of uprooting the tree stumps?

They felt stumped.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the politician like to winnow grain on the farm?

He liked how it is spelled: win now.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the telephone wires want to go to a therapist?

Because they were high strung.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a Jewish congregation in Orange County that tries to focus on their prayers?

Concentrated Orange Jews.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a Polish person who is fishing?

A fishing Pole.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the Sherlock Holmes story where he solves the mystery of the missing pillow?

The pillow case.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the letter O called when it acts strange?

A weirdo.

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