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Akiva Lane
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When Alan was arrested, why couldn't he accept invitations?

He was fully booked.

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What did Alan do when he left his 5th floor apartment in the old apartment building without an elevator?

He walked down and later walked up the run-down staircase in the run-down walk-up.

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress?

Congress.

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How did David feel about praying in a talis?

It was a fringe benefit.

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How did they describe the situation where the band's bass players were drunk?

The basses were loaded.

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Where does superman shop for food?

The supermarket.

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Will wind turbines be successful in producing clean energy?

The answer is blowing in the wind.

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Why can't you trust a school system that has no one running the schools?

They have no principles.

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Are people in a family 'absolute'?

They are 'relative', that's why they are called relatives.

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Why was there a rainbow after the flood of Noah's ark?

Because he passed with flying colors.

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What involves getting into the nitty-gritty of what is right and wrong?

Inte-gritty.

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Why was the hot dog happy?

Because it was on a roll.

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