Pictures:

Why did Bill's moving company shake the furniture as they moved it?

Because they wanted to be movers and shakers.

1986

What is similar between a thief and shoes to run in?

They are both sneakers.

1252

When we feel blessed, why do we feel like singing?

Because the word blessing ends with the word sing.

2762

Why wasn't the company making money?

Its strategy made no cents.

1945

What kind of carrots are worth their weight in gold?

24 karats.

934

How did worms get onto Noah's ark?

They came in pears.

2291

What is the hardest thing about making a sidewalk?

The cement.

1660

What was the double-jointed acrobat very good at?

Patting himself on the back.

1559

What is news from last week called?

Olds.

2074

What do you call an appointment that gets cancelled?

A dis-appointment.

3029

Why didn't Fred accept rides with other people, and preferred to walk?

Because he didn't want to be taken for a ride.

867

How did the lawyers refer to the case of the pillow company being sued?

The pillow case.

1825