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After a long winter, how did the tree feel in the spring?

It felt releaved.

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When John proposed to Joan, what playing card did he look like to Joan?

The King of Hearts.

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What do you call ticks that live in a parrot's feathers?

Polly ticks.

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How did Oedipus feel when he found out about his parents?

Oedipus wreck.

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What do you call a costume made up of sun, moon, and stars?

The disguise is the skies.

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What is someone called who can't stop weaving on a loom?

A loomatic.

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What do you call a Polish person who is fishing?

A fishing Pole.

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How did workers feel about going out on strike?

They felt the labor pains would give birth to a better situation.

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Why did Bill start running the 100 yard dash?

He wanted to get his life back on track.

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Why did Cynthia love her calculator?

Because she knew that she could always count on it.

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Why didn't Jack like playing Monopoly?

He felt like he was going around in circles.

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What is someone called who tunes the instruments for an opera house?

An opera tunist.

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