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Akiva Lane
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How did the Smith family feel when they spent a lot of money painting their house blue, and they didn't like the color?

They felt they blew it, and they had the blues.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of doctor is similar to a boring teacher?

An anesthesiologiest - they both put people to sleep.

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Akiva Lane
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What psychiatric tool is similar the noses of hippies?

Hip noses.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of static is very happy?

Ecstatic.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Billy write in all capital letters?

He wanted to practice being a Capitalist.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of suit do you go into the water wearing?

A bathing suit.

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Akiva Lane
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What are reporters who never retire called?

Permanent press.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the section of a hardware store that deals with fences called?

The department of de fence.

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Akiva Lane
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What do sales people do when they make big sales?

They have a sell-abration.

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How is a person who is looking for parking like Lady Macbeth?

He feels like saying 'Out out damn spot'!

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Akiva Lane
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What is a person who stops exercizing called?

An ex-exercizer.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the towel feel so tired after it was used?

It felt like a wrung out towel.

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