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What phone app helps you go to sleep for short periods of time?

The Nap App.

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At what kind of table does one read the New York Times?

The Times table.

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Was Anna a vegetarian?

Actually, she was vague on if she was a vegan.

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When Alan was arrested, why couldn't he accept invitations?

He was fully booked.

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What is it called when you tell something to your grandmother?

Tell a gram.

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How did the students of the brilliant physics professor refer to him?

Dr. Know.

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What rap singer also told puns?

Rapunzel

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Why did the football player like feeling the backs of geese?

He liked the idea of 'touch down'.

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What is a long document written by a lawyer called?

A brief.

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Do cows generally live alone?

It's generally un-herd of.

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What month should you be careful not to buy fake jewelry?

Jewel lie.

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How do you say in one word that the media is not high quality?

Mediacrity.

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