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Akiva Lane
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How did Max feel about having lice?

It made him feel lousy.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was it that in the ancient world harps could not be trusted?

Because they were all lyres.

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Why did Janet eat from a bag of dates when she talked to Joe at work?

She wanted him to ask her for a date.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the shepherd find the sheep so heavy?

Wherever he would lead them, they were lead.

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Akiva Lane
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What does a person say who lives in a suite of rooms in a hotel?

Home suite home.

1950
Akiva Lane
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What fruit is the favorite of men and women getting to know each other?

Dates.

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What can you say about the courtroom of Judge Alan Fier?

Each of his trials was a trial by Fier.

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What does getting up in the morning have to do with Newton's laws of motion?

A body at rest tends to stay at rest.

1868
Akiva Lane
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How did farmer Jones know not to feed his ox eggs?

Because the ox rebelled against any yokes.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Jack learn to give himself a haircut?

He knew it off the top of his head.

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Akiva Lane
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What would be the result if you used incense made from mushrooms?

A mushroom cloud.

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What was Pandora guilty of?

Out of the box thinking.

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