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Akiva Lane
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To measure the size of a bagel, how much of the bagel do you include?

You include the whole.

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Akiva Lane
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What does superman use to keep the sun from his eyes?

A super visor.

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Akiva Lane
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When Anne's mother suggested that she learn how to play bridge, what was Anne's response?

I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call someone who is always drinking coffee?

A caf-fiend.

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Akiva Lane
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What location do these symbols refer to?

Times Square.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the beginning and end of a hail storm called?

Inhale and exhale.

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't Bill promise his wife that he would be a billionaire?

Because that didn't look very promising.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Betty happy with the work of the seamstress?

It was sew good.

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Akiva Lane
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What relative did Bill Royd name the phone operating system after?

Aunt Royd.

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Akiva Lane
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What gift does the soccer player not like to receive?

He doesn't like ties, he prefers to get victories.

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Akiva Lane
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When the camp went camping, what did they call the group that got splinters?

The splinter group.

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Akiva Lane
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What can you say about people who live on the Iraq/Iran border?

They live between Iraq and a hard place.

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