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Akiva Lane
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Why did the dirty dishes in the sink feel connected to each other?

Because they were all in sync.

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Akiva Lane
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What are the best schools to learn about intravenous feeding?

The IV league schools.

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What word describes eating food out of cans?

Uncanny.

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What gift does the soccer player not like to receive?

He doesn't like ties, he prefers to get victories.

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What did the Howard Knot Rope Company say about its competitors?

They're not Knot knots.

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How did Amanda feel about the fact that science doesn't understand why people are ticklish?

She thought it was mys-tickle.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a repairman that fixes clocks called?

A tik-tok doc.

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Akiva Lane
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When you put chili sauce in the refrigerator in Santiago, what does it become?

Chile chilly chili sauce.

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Why did Mr. and Mrs. Beaver find it hard to get along?

Because they found each other so dam a-gnawing.

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Now that the Peter bought a dairy farm, what will he do with it?

He'll milk it for all its worth.

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How did Emma feel when she had a dream during a nap that she was elected president?

It felt like a power nap.

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What was Fred's reaction when someone suggested that he become a chiropracter?

He was taken aback.

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