Pictures:

Shane Ronay
General
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why did the man make window blinds from potato peels?

He heard they were a nightshade.

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Shane Ronay
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What did the lady on the subway say when a panhandler asked for a donation?

Sorry, I'm strapped at the moment.

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Shane Ronay
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What did Jay say when there was an explosion at his factory?

"Let the chips fall where they may".

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Shane Ronay
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Why did Debra Smith come up with exactly 1,263 famous idioms?

That's all she wrote.

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Shane Ronay
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Why is lumping people together not a good practice?

Because to average them is "mean".

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Shane Ronay
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Why did the telemarketer use his clavicle to rest his headset?

Because that's his caller bone.

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Shane Ronay
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How do you make a waterbed more bouncy?

Use spring water.

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Shane Ronay
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Why did the man give up Reader's Digest?

He had a digestive disorder.

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Shane Ronay
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What diagnosis caused the man to break his leg by being too anxious?

A stress fracture

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Shane Ronay
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What is this man's motto?

"A waist is a terrible thing to waste".

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Shane Ronay
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P.T. Barnum was right...

There is a sucker born every minute.

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Shane Ronay
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How did the rock group debase themselves?

By firing their bass player.

2017