Pictures:

Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What do you get when your optician is a comedian?

A man who makes a spectacle of himself.

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Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What items does someone most need to weather an emergency?

Staples

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Shane Ronay
General
Picture

Why is it that lions get more food than tigers, leopards, and jaguars?

They always get the lion's share

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Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What happens if you ask your builder not to carpet the steps in your house?

He'll give you a blank stair.

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Shane Ronay
General
Picture

How did Joe afford an expensive water filter system for his home?

At a liquidation sale.

1212
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What are abortions called in Czechoslovakia?

Cancelled Czechs

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Shane Ronay
General
Picture

Who is Darth Vader's wife?

Her name is Ellie Vader - she really uplifts him.

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Shane Ronay
General
Picture

Why did the writer visit the U.S. Mint?

To coin a phrase.

199
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What was the first name of the woman who invented soft drinks, and where did she live?

Sarah soda

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Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What's good advice when photographing celestial beings?

Be sure you get the best angel.

1027
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

How did the man get his young dog to stop barking?

He wore Hush Puppies

220
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What is this an example of?

A knee jerk reaction.

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