Pictures:

What's he doing?

Flying by the seat of his pants.

1281

Why did Bill not become a gastroenterologist?

He didn't have the guts.

2018

Why was it so easy to reverse-engineer this dessert recipe?

It was a piece of cake.

1261

Why was was it so loud everywhere Tim went?

He liked stealing everyone's thunder.

1320

Which college shows the most compassion to fire victims?

Aw, burn University

484

What did the Design major do when he wasn't accepted to the program?

He went back to the drawing board.

1818

Why did Paul put on his glasses when working with his team?

To make sure everyone was clear.

1231

What happens to unsold bread from the bakery?

It's toast.

434

How are a sanitation truck and computer similar?

Both are garbage in / garbage out

590

Why was a homeless man invited to join the London Symphony Orchestra??

They needed someone to play an 'oboe'.

823

What happens when military officers attend a party?

They order everyone "a round".

1232

Which vegetable is best served mashed?

Squash

1046