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How does one shorten a coughing fit?

Using a hack

1396

Why are Persians good forecastors of future events?

Because they can far see (Farsi).

2237

If bored people chose a leader, what would the postion be called?

Chairman of the bored.

2092

What's another name for a metronome.

A beat-nik.

787

Why did the newborn require immediate surgery?

He was born with a silver spoon in his mouth.

1274

What time is it 15 minutes before you finish a meal?

A quarter to ate.

174

What is full of holes but still can hold a lot of water?

A sponge.

967

What did Danny do when the bullies wouldn't let other kids go on the slide?

He let it slide.

2734

Why did Sam look online for a site that sold scratch?

He wanted to build things from scratch.

1858

What do you call someone who is an expert about alarm clocks?

An alarmist.

1588

What does a big fine for drunken driving have in common with English grammar?

Sin tax.

890

What music do they play in Boulder, Colorado?

Rock music.

2566