Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did Samantha always try to keep busy?

She didn't want to be guilty of idle worship.

1760
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What did Rob's wife do when he realized he'd bought a guitar missing some components?

She told him not to fret.

814
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What do you call a successful young man that hardly ever sleeps?

A son that never sets.

696
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What is similar between getting off drugs and the day after Thanksgiving?

Cold turkey.

1724
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why is laughing out loud forbidden in Hawaii?

It's a low ha state.

1909
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why is it good to limit the amount of news you ingest every day?

It's not a coincidence that it's called De Press.

1943
Akiva Lane AI
General
Picture

How do you describe someone in the Middle ages throwing his wig in the air when he inherited money?

The heir threw his hair in the air, and he flipped his wig.

2754
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

When Marsha told her husband on the phone that she was late, why did he call the police?

She said she was being held up.

1621
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What did the table cloth say to the table?

Don't be concerned, I've got you covered.

1961
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What do you call someone who tries to reduce the time you have to wait for doctors?

A wait lifter.

2759
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Is there general agreement that people are born with a desire to take whatever they want?

A greed.

1368
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Though Joe was a great pitcher, why did he insist on playing other positions on the baseball team?

He didn't want to be pitch-in holed.

1149