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What fictional character had an open mind?

Frankenstein.

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What is the difference between a fish and a bathroom?

A fish has many scales, and a bathroom usually has one scale.

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Why was the carpet depressed?

It felt a lack of respect because everyone walked all over it.

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What is MOM spelled upside down?

WOW!

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Why were the Middle Ages called the Dark Ages?

Because there were so many knights.

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What is it called when a fusion nuclear reaction starts acting unpredictably?

Con-fusion.

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Why did Betty stop eating sausage?

She thought it was the wurst.

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How did the 2 robbers work together?

They would co-robberate.

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What did Jimmy call the money he made from selling thumb tacks?

Income tacks.

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How do you get someone to say 'Who's there?'

You say 'Knock, knock'

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Why did Martha practice drawing lions?

Her therapist said that there were times she had to get better at drawing the lion.

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If FedEx merged with UPS, what would the new company be called?

Fed Up.

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