Pictures:

Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why is it best to avoid jealousy?

Because it ends with lousy.

1830
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

Why did this guy think he'd be good at bartending?

He came from a "pour" family.

2523
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What do you call someone who measures how much status people have?

A statustician

2397
Shane Ronay
General
Picture

Which field of study is best for life coaches to major in?

Pathology

755
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why didn't Mike want to go to the supermarket?

He was afraid of the 'eggs aisle'.

2148
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why did the rock band like playing on wide stages?

They liked having good bandwidth.

1641
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What construction machine is named after a bird?

The crane.

2203
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What con-man conquered a large part of Asia?

Genghis Con

56
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What kind of fruit did they use against Donald Trump?

He was impeached twice.

719
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What French Queen did not advocate dieting?

Marie Antoinette said 'Let them eat cake.'

2200
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What do discount stores and farewell parties have in common?

They have a lot of good buys.

2459
Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What is the difference between a real man and one that is not real?

One is Sir Real, and the other is surreal.

1727