Pictures:

Shane Ronay
General
Picture

Are these seagulls?

No, they're stool pigeons.

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Akiva Lane
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What is considered reasonable at the UN?

Things that are un-reasonable.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the people playing poker surround themselves with bushes?

They wanted to hedge their bets.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a pencil too short to sharpen anymore?

A point of no return.

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Akiva Lane
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What does a penthouse have in common with the lead article in a magazine?

They are both a cover story.

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Akiva Lane
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Picture

What do you call a place with a lot of spiders?

A web site.

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Akiva Lane
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Picture

What is similar between a worn out tire and getting social security?

It may be time to retire.

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Akiva Lane
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When Mark got sick and couldn't play trumpet in the school band for a week, what did he do?

The doctor gave him a note that he couldn't play notes.

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Akiva Lane
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Picture

What continent is named after ants?

Antartica.

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Shane Ronay
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Picture

Why do deer hunters prefer larger guns?

It's a bigger bang for their buck.

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Akiva Lane
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Picture

What does a warning label on a large strainer say?

Don't strain yourself.

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Akiva Lane
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What was it called when Pierre welcomed and praised his guests over a glass of wine?

French toast.

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