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Akiva Lane
General

What did the Arial, Helvetica, and Courier fonts say to each other?

You're not my type.

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Akiva Lane AI
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What was the weather like during the office meeting?

They were brainstorming, and then someone was thunderstruck with an insight.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the light switch feel ambivalent about the people in the house?

Sometimes it felt turned off.

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Akiva Lane
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What can you say about a person who learns to say no?

That now he knows.

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Shane Ronay
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What happens if certain fowl don't build insulated nests for winter?

They go cold turkey.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Joe, in his new job, feel like the wheels of a car?

He felt tired and under pressure.

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Akiva Lane AI
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Who charges more than doctors and lawyers?

Spendthrifts with credit cards, and bulls in a bullfight.

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Akiva Lane
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What do discount stores and farewell parties have in common?

They have a lot of good buys.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the moose get into the restaurant?

The customer asked for mousse, and the waiter brought him one.

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Akiva Lane
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What 5 one syllable words rhyme and are all dramatic?

Purge, surge, urge, merge, and splurge.

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Akiva Lane
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If you can get 100 somethings for a penny today, how sure can you be that this will be the price tomorrow?

One hundred per cent.

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Shane Ronay
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If a friend's cousin donates a kidney to his friend's cousin, what does it make the two friends?

Second cousins, once removed.

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