Pictures:

Shane Ronay
General
Picture

Why did the writer visit the U.S. Mint?

To coin a phrase.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What happens to an illegally parked frog?

Toad.

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Akiva Lane
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What do garbanzo beans have in common with a sedative for chickens?

Chick peace.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why didn't people believe this when they saw it?

They thought it was pi in the sky.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a doctor called who takes care of stomach gas?

A fizz-ician.

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Akiva Lane
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If the second hand on a clock measures seconds, what does the first hand measure?

Either minutes or hours, but we're not sure.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

Why was the elephant that lived in Manhattan depressed?

It couldn't find work, so it felt ir-elephant.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What did the cat - whose name was Yow - say?

Me Yow.

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Shane Ronay
General
Picture

Do allergists make a good living?

It's nothing to sneeze at.

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Akiva Lane
General
Picture

What is similar between the rules of a bar and buying something at a store?

They both use a bar code.

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Akiva Lane
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What is someone called who lies about how much he eats?

Dish-onest.

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Akiva Lane
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Why is Ilan Musk very interested in learning about people who live in marshes?

Because they are marshans.

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