Pictures:

What happens if two silk worms have a race?

They end in a tie.

2280

Why did Arnold lie down next to bread in the bakery?

He wanted to be rolling in dough.

762

Is there anything absolute about families?

It's all relative.

1728

Why are the Patriot missiles kosher?

Because they have fins and chew their scuds.

821

What is it called when cars protest public lies by honking their horns?

Taking the bull by the horns.

628

Why did the cinnamon havester quit his job?

He kept barking up the wrong tree.

1796

What's going on here?

A feeding friendsy.

1279

Why is the word 'laptop' misleading?

It shouldn't be used on the lap, because of the heat and radiation it generates to the body.

1590

When Martha was quiet when she found out she was pregnant, what was that called?

A pregnant silence.

137

How did Arnold react when he got the job as conductor of the orchestra?

It was music to his ears.

521

After someone stole Bobby's clothes while he was swimming, did he get home without people seeing him?

Yes, but just barely.

301

How did the ferris wheel owner feel about having almost no customers?

He felt like he was just spinning his wheels.

642